I’ve spent a majority of my life believing I’m lazy, and yet I had a hard time resting today.
How does that make any sense?
See, I keep 3 of my grandchildren 4 days a week. My other 2 (soon to be 3) grandchildren were here over the weekend as well with my daughter. Sunday, we had a family dinner with 11 of us, where I cooked and then cleaned everything up. Plus when the grands are here, they rarely go to their mama or daddy for anything; they come to their Nonie. 🙂
I’m not looking for sympathy; my life is my own. I just say all of that to make a point; I have been busy and feel like I’m on the verge of getting sick. #ColdandFluSeason My immune system is working overtime, and I need to slow down before it crashes.
No one was in my house today, and I needed to rest.
That has proven harder than I believe it should.
How can that be? I’m lazy, remember?
So here’s the thing, as I’ve been busy lately, I’ve been thinking about this belief I have that I am lazy. The evidence has started to point out that perhaps the belief is a lie.
I could tell you my father once told my brother and others I got laid off from a job because I was lazy. I could tell you my husband spent years implying I was lazy because I didn’t do things on his timeline. I could tell you about all the school moms who thought I was lazy because I was a stay-at-home mom. I won’t even though I kind of just did.
I got left with the understanding that it was simply fact; I am lazy.
BUT… here’s the truth:
It does not matter what others believed or said about me. It matters what I believe about me.
*I take care of people, grocery shop, cook food, and my house is relatively clean. That’s not the way of a lazy person.
*I like to play video games but rarely do because I’m afraid I’ll get lost playing all day/all week and not get anything done. That’s not a lazy person’s mentality.
*I repair, change, and rearrange things in my house regularly so it doesn’t get out of hand or boring. That’s not something a lazy person does.
*I had a hard time resting today. A lazy person does not have to make themselves rest.
But I did have to make myself, because I am in need of rest.
That is not laziness.
I will not feel guilty.
I do not have to make excuses about why it was necessary.
Tomorrow is a new day.
I will no longer believe an old lie.